Apple Trees, Average Guys, And The Pool Boy

A perfect boy with a girlfriend is like an apple. The apple is beautiful, red, and ripe for the picking. No wormholes, no bruises. You're just about to take a bite of this wonderful apple and someone approaches you saying, "Don't eat that! It's covered in pesticides!" As I'm searching for a homecoming date it seems as though all the good guys are taken. Infact I have to spend this Saturday with one of these guys and their girlfriend. Yay. Even people who are super obnoxious and annoying have boyfriends/girlfriends. I suppose to other people I may be annoying too. While I'm searching for a guys who's not annoying should I really be searching for someone who is equally annoying?

Caramel Apple Mocha
(Perfect and totally single)

Why are only popular guys attractive? Why can't for once there actually be a sexy loner who's really smart? Like in the movies. Anytime I'm searching facebook I see all these attractive guys but then I read their facebook posts and I learn a whole bunch of vulgar terms that I've never even heard of before! I've never once walked into my honors classes and said, "Wow, he's good looking." I'm involved in the geekiest clubs at my school so even if I wanted to I don't really have a chance at meeting some vulgar, hot, probably hormonal teenage boy. SO I get to pick from: non attractive, really intelligent and most likely harboring some secret talent for music or some very attractive, (I don't like to use the word stupid but it's the only one that fits) stupid, with some talent for a sport. Why can't I have a semi attractive male, with average intelligence, who actually gets off the computer once in awhile and has at least a liking for music?
I realize I ask a lot more questions than I answer and I apologize. Although no one usually comes to me for advice. They oddly enough just like to listen to my ranting. I've been told that my voice impressions are very entertaining. If someone ever asks me for advice they usually don't want advice they just want me to make them laugh and feel better about their situation.
Does anyone else have those friends where you're trying to like vent all your anger out and they make it about themselves but in a really obvious way? "I've been really down lately about my whole situation with my dad and everything."
"Well my boyfriend implied that I looked fat!"
Anyone have those friends? Am I the only one? Or how about those people that talk to you really slow. "Hiiiiiiiii myyyyyyy naaaaaammmmmeeee issssss *JEN-NA. Diiiiiiiiiiiiid you unnnnnndeerrstand what the teeeachhher wasssss taaaaaallllking abbbbbouttttt?" I'm a blonde not an idiot. I can't decide if they do that to me because I'm blonde or because they think I don't understand English since I choose not to talk to them on any occasion that I don't have too. Why must popular people assume everyone likes them and if you don't like them you're obviously a freak, weirdo, or loner?
I'm trying to hurry with this blog post because the apple I like may be working at the pool today and I don't want to miss him.
My trip to (Insert name of Latin Country here) is coming up soon and all I can think about is the cute way I've devised to ask a boy to homecoming but all the guys I like (including pool boy) are apples. I would call him on the pay phone all romantic like and say, "I knew that the only way I'd be brave enough to ask you to homecoming was if I was more than 1000 miles away." I'm tempted to call one of them and just see what he says. Although their girlfriends may not be too happy with me. Although girls never are very happy with me when it comes to their boyfriends/crushes. I'm not sure what it is but I have a talent for ruining relationships. They really should be blaming the guy. I have a flirtatious personality. People keep telling me that it isn't hard to not be flirty but it is a personality trait and I can't help it. It's like if someone told a teenage boy to stop being hormonal or a comedian to stop being funny. Oh well. I hope it doesn't get me into too much trouble.
Well that's all for today. I need to shave and actually get ready for the day. However I have no where to go and nothing to do but a huge pile of summer homework but I figure me getting reading will put it off the inevitable. Sex And The City Is On today. How can I focus on homework?? This is so unfair! I also eventually have to practice trumpet and piano. Trumpet, piano, and summer homework, and I'm here judging other people's geekiness.