the Proper Woman's Guide to Dating

Obviously, as society we have forgotten what proper dating is. When a man opens the door for me, flashes a huge grin, and says, "See? Chivalry is not dead," I have to resist the urge not to roll my eyes back into my head. Pointing out chivalry is really annoying, Plus the same guy texted me when he got to my house instead of coming to my door. Here are general rules:

No kissing until the 3rd date (Unless of course it's New Year's Eve)

• While the wait sucks for both parties, kissing him may give him the wrong idea. The third date is when the secrets come out. If you still like him after you discover his weird quirks then you may kiss him. If you kiss him too soon then you risk him falling in love with you before you decide if you really like him or not. Waiting saves his feelings. 

No house dates until after the 5th date

• House dates might cause you to dress more casual than you should. Also house date means make out session. We all know it. This goes along the whole kissing line. You don't want to lead him on before you know you like him. Unnecessary broken hearts are no fun at all. Also you want him to get in the habit of making sure he is clean. House dates too soon promote sloppy behavior. The smell can be very gross if you do not wait long enough.

You must date for a minimum of 1 month before becoming official

• Dating other people while dating him encourages him to be on his best behavior. He knows he is competing. Do not rub this fact in his face, but make subtle hints occasionally. If you talk about other men then you will upset him. No man likes to be taken advantage of. He may not know that you really like him.

You should be granted access to his phone as he will have access to mine

• No man should accuse his girlfriend of thinking he is untrustworthy because she wants to see his phone. Sometimes we like to be reassured or we just want to look at your pictures. There is no reason for guys to get all upset if their girlfriend wants to see their phone. Please have the decency to pretend you don't look at porn. SO YES! If you want access to your man's phone then you better give him access to your's!  

Always dress as well as possible for the occasion 

Perfect for the rainy days <3

• If you don't dress nice then neither will he.

Rules for your man that if he is not following you should worry:

He must become friends with your gay best friend

• Friends in general. He doesn't have to be best friends in a sense, but he has to communicate with them. I do not want him being a stranger to my friends.

He must pay for dinner unless on special occasions such as his birthday

• Girls provide boobs and guys provide money for dinner. That's how it goes. It's like unspoken prostitution, but cleaner and with emotions...Okay, not my best analogy, but you get my point.

He should not be insulted if you ask him where he is going for the night (You am simply curious)

• There is no reason to get upset that I want to know where you are going unless you are doing something that I would not approve of. If you are doing something that you do not feel comfortable telling me about, then stop doing it. 

He must put in the effort to smell like a normal human.

He must come to your door. 

He must add you on all his social media sites.

To be 5 minutes late because he lost his way is one thing. Being a half hour late because he was slow is another. 

• Continuous tardiness should not be tolerated 

There are so many more rules. Dating is unfortunately a game, but the prize is love and that is worth fighting for. Remember that if you do not put in the effort then neither will he. Thank you for dropping by and remember playing people is wrong, unsafe sex can lead to bad things, kissing is not a crime, addiction to anything is unhealthy in its own way, children are huge responsibilities, tight dresses are not comfortable on your period, laundry must be done, wrinkle free shirts are the best investment, you should never leave the house without lip gloss, you will never regret keeping an extra pair of pants in your locker, too much salt causes bloating, you are your own person, Sex and the City is your guide to life, not everything happens for a reason but it will keep on happening anyway, no one book should dictate how you live your life, yourself in 5 years will be a combination of the people you meet and the books you read, feminism means equality, and you do not have to be artistic to do art.